Crazy Shabbat candle had multiple wicks and was like torch last night.
Not so writerly
Staring at the bottom of a vodka bottle doesn’t have much impact since you can always see the bottom of a bottle of vodka.
Business Papa just returned from France and guess what I got! TGIF is perfect.
So, tonight was “Two Free Questions Night” with eBoy
Annnnd…
1. How are babies made? (Gee thanks kiddo) Um, well, there’s a mommy, a birth mommy, and a daddy, and um, they, um, have special naked time. And when you are older I will tell you all about it, in great detail, don’t worry. Next question?
2. How do animals make babies? Oy, the same way as people do. eBoy, “Huh? How do animals have special, naked time?” Me, “Oh, look at the time, give daddy a kiss, good night, I love you.”
Why do I always start screaming when math is involved? It’s just fucking math!
$2.99 on Kindle.
You know who you are, now start working shit out.
Reblogged from I Have Tan Skin
Best Mother’s Day Quote
Mom, “Nobody alphabetizes anymore! These young generations have no idea how to alphabetize. When I’m losing my mind, I’m going to alphabetize those thousands of business cards I’ve collected.”
Um, when you loose your mind?
So as he plays Minecraft he has My Little Pony songs playing in a browser so he doesn’t “get creeped out” by the zombies or whatever.
When play collides.
when i have kids
imma fuck with them
even when nothing happened imma act like they in trouble
ask them shit like
“why the teacher called me today?”
“what kid were you harassing? don’t lie!”
then imma watch that nigga fess up and crumble
stupid mothafucka
This tumblr is hilarious! I roll with every post. Check it out.
Reblogged from EVEN IF U DONT ADMIT U A FAN... UR MAN WILL
And, after all that delicious culture, I sip a quick glass of Malbec in a Penn Station bar (can you imagine!) while waiting for the train home.
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From LA to NYC to the Jersey 'burbs. Former gayboy playboy raising two kids, taking care of hubby and home with a dash of sass, a still decent ass, and an oversize wine glass.
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